SLIPPING, FALLEN, CAN'T GET UP....................

Hello to you all, and thanks (again) for taking time out of your day to check out my blog. I REALLY appreciate that from the bottom of my heart. I write to you today with a very heavy heart. You see, I lost a very close and dear friend of mine. This didn't happen recently. It actually happened around late 2005 through early 2006. I'm just now REALIZING that this dude is gone, the truest, most down, real to the heart, dude that walked this earth, and it took me all of this time to realize that he was nowhere to be found anymore. I mean, when you looked in the dictionary for the definition of "ON POINT ON ALL FRONTS", you saw this guys' photo. Yet, it took a real self assessment before I realized that this guy was gone, and that I was missing him so very much.

Let me digress for a minute, please. I'm at a very dark place right now in so many areas of my life: my spirituality, marriage, finances, relationship with my children, relationship with my other family members, et. al, are all either out of whack or bankrupt and empty. This is because I allowed or watch it all happened with an attitude of disdain, contempt, or disregard. At the time, I was good with what was happening. I didn't think anything was wrong with what was occurring. With my spirituality, I knew that if I dropped down on my knees and prayed about it, the LORD would cover me. It didn't matter that I wasn't trying to have conversations with him on a daily basis. I called on him when I NEEDED him and he ALWAYS answered, so I had that covered. HE asked that I talk to him EVERYDAY, but I chose to speak with him on the 8th day of the week. You know, NeedDay (the days when I needed something). I am married to SUPERWOMAN, and I'm not being facetious when I say this. She has me covered on ALL fronts, and her ONLY expectation of me is for me to, as she says, "love her and make her feel special". So, what do I do? Just the opposite, to the point where I shut her out because I felt like she was doing the same to me. Because of poor business decisions made by family members now deceased, I'm faced with paying back loans that I co-signed for them. With this comes threats of garnishment, negative credit information, etc. My relationship with my children (particularly my sons) is not where I need it to be. I can't get them involved in other extra-curricular activities that would benefit them socially and academically. After 2009, I basically turned my back on certain members of my family. Now, some of those deserved this treatment and still do, but others certainly did not. But in my mind, because of some past behavior on their behalf towards other members in my family, I justified disavowing them like I have. Going back to my sons, because my heart is so filled with anger and disdain towards their mother, I leave no room for she and I to be cordial so we can truly co-parent the boys. Despite this, when people see me on the day to day, they have no idea of what is going on with me unless they are one of the very few I've made privy to my story.

So, now you see why it is so important that I find my friend. None of these things would have happened to him because he made sure he covered any and every possibility. He never took chances that he wasn't ALMOST absolutely sure about, and he had major plans for the future. I need to get with him because, other than JESUS CHRIST on the spiritual level, he is the ONLY earthly person who can give me the assistance and support I'm going to need to get back to where I need and want to be. I just hope he'll be open to helping me out. After all, he's probably so very disappointed in how I've been living as of late, and righteously so.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I know by now you are trying to figure out who this guy is, or if he even exists. Well, trust me. He does exist. And he truly appreciates the opportunity to share his experiences with well-wishers and good people like you all. You see...........................................
despite all these things that have transpired and that I've messed up, STILL I RISE and will continue to because GOD loves me and it's my manifest destiny. Just so you know......................


That guy is me...........................................................................

AND THEY CALL IT "HUMAN RESOURCES".........

I've been employed with the same entity for almost twenty-two (22) years. This particular business has been very good to me. However, over those years I've seen a change for the worse in how this business has operated. I've seen careers destroyed or jeopardized by uncaring, heartless, unqualified people. I've seen people get hired not based on their being qualified, but because they knew somebody in a position of power. Then, when someone who is in a job under this perpetrator calls that perpetrator out, they become defensive. They develop a vendetta against the subordinate. That subordinate becomes the hunted.

The Human Resources Department of the Fulton County Board of Education has established a reputation for reveling in seeing individuals terminated from their jobs. Recently, a young man who is deeply rooted in the Fulton County School System was terminated from his job based purely on his relationship with the principal of the building where he was assigned. He is known for being outspoken, especially on behalf of those who were victimized because they weren't confrontational.

"LET'S DEFINE CHILD SUPPORT"

It's been a long time, Good People! I promise to be brief on this one, but I have to bring this to you all so I can get this off of my chest. Plus, I need your feedback as usual.

I'm a divorced man paying child support. Let me repeat that. I'm a divorced man PAYING child support for my two sons. In an earlier blog, I mentioned how the court system and a judge had done me a grave injustice so I won't re-hash that part of it. I don't mind telling you that I pay and exorbitant amount of money monthly to my ex-wife. In all honesty, the amount is not that big of a deal to me because the money is (supposedly) for the care of my children. This is where my dilemma begins. On numerous occasions, my sons (whom I have EVERY weekend) have come to me in need of clothing, haircuts, new shoes, school supplies, etc. My question is "How is this so?" Believe me, the amount I pay in support is enough for my sons to get at least four sets of designer clothing and two pairs of "Air Jordans" A MONTH for each one of them ! That's right, I said each and every month. And once those purchases are made, they wo uld have enough left over to feed, clothe, and provide for a third child if necessary! This is the gospel, and for those of you who know me, you know I'm telling the truth.

So, this is my question to you all: IF, IN FACT, THE COURT DEMANDS THAT A MAN PAYS "CHILD SUPPORT", DOES THAT NOT MEAN IT IS FOR THE CHILD/CHILDREN? WHY IN THE HELL IS THE MOTHER NOT ACCOUNTABLE FOR THIS MONEY THAT IS DESIGNATED FOR THE CHILD/CHILDREN? IF MEN CAN HAVE THEIR FREEDOM TAKEN BECAUSE THEY DON'T PAY THE SUPPORT, SHOULDN'T WOMEN BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE/LOCKED UP FOR NOT USING THE FUNDS FOR WHAT IT IS INTENDED? WHEN THESE WOMEN DON'T DO THIS, IS THAT NOT A MISAPPROPRIATION OF FUNDS? Brothers out there, I know you feel me. I'm really interested in what the women have to say on this issue...................................................................

Men and Women...............THE "REAL DEAL"

What's the good word, My People???? I'm here to try to stimulate amongst you some discourse on one of the many issues that impact our community. I'd like to thank my girl Celeste (living in Korea) for putting this issue to me during one of our phone conversations. The conversation was so very deep, and she conveyed to me some of the things that women deal with in the relationship realm. Naturally, I gave her my two cents worth of an opinion, but it made me want to put this out there to you guys, to hear what your opinions are on the issue. So, here we go.........................

I want to know why it is so very hard for us to sustain true, meaningful, heterosexual relationships these days. Now, for us to really have a dialogue on this, it will require those of you who read this to respond frankly and truthfully. I'm sure, gentlemen, that the ladies are dying to hear some straight up answers from some straight up men. Ladies rest assured that the brothers also will be waiting with baited breath for your responses as well. I was talking to a co-worker last Monday. She asked me why men won't treat a "good woman" right. I asked her to define what treating her right equated to. She commenced to telling me that she cooked, cleaned, took care of the children, entertained company, attended and was active in her church, etc. Yet, she advised, she couldn't find a man who wasn't initially trying to get her in bed. I kept it real with her and told her that men approach women, 95% of the time, based on the woman's physical attributes. I mean, what else can they base their approach on? They don't know a woman other than what they see initially, right? I then asked her if a man tries to sleep with her within a certain amount of time once they meet, does that necessarily make him "bad, a dog, or unworthy"? She responded that in her opinion, it does or it at least makes her weary. I then asked what was a good length of time for a man to wait before feeling comfortable enough with the woman to inquire about intimacy. She said it varies from relationship to relationship. I agreed, but I also asked how does a man know this without asking, either verbally or by action??? We agreed that it was a trial and error type deal. The bottom line is the respect factor. As a man, you can find out ANYTHING you want to about a woman by being forthright and respectful. Our conversation went on and other co-workers joined in (all of them women). I could see in their faces that they were both surprised and pleased with my candor in answering questions about men and why we do what we do in relationships. I then asked some questions of the women, such as "why is it that when a hard working, faithful man does right in a relationship, why are there instances where the woman dogs that man?" You should've seen the faces on those ladies!!!!! Men have been painted as the "low-down" ones for so long, but since the 1980's women have turned the tables on men. They've become more independent and as a result have become more confident in making decisions in the relationships they get involved in. Men used to go to clubs to hook up for those "infamous one night stands"! Now, women go to clubs on the hunt, capture some guy they think is attractive, get what they want from him, and tell him you ain't gotta go home, but you gotta get the hell up outta here!". Yep, puts him right out like the herby-curby on trash day!!!! This mindset on the parts of both men and women is not conducive to true monogamous relationships. The only way for these types of relationships to flourish in this day and time is to have one basis/foundation: THE BIBLE! Yeah, that's right. IF you (man or woman) are trying to have a meaningful relationship, you must have a spiritual foundation. Now, I said the Bible for those of us who follow the Christian faith, but this applies to whatever document or book you read in your particular faith. That "publication" is the great equalizer, something that provides guidelines for both sexes to move forward in a relationship. The guidelines in these books help prevent self-esteem problems, feelings of being taken for granted ( a lot of women deal with these issues) as well as feelings of insecurity and weakness towards infidelity (men's issues). Tell me how you feel about this, good people. I'm waiting to take your responses back to my co-workers!!!!